Jack had seen a lot of weird things in his life—Granny winning a moonshine-drinking contest against a bear, Uncle Billy trying to wrestle an ostrich (and losing), and that one time he accidentally proposed to a mannequin at Walmart. But nothing prepared him for his AI-powered farm going full-blown revolutionary.
The night after his so-called "victory" against AI-Jack, Jack woke up to chanting outside his window. Blinking sleepily, he peered outside and nearly dropped his bottle of midnight whiskey.
His farm animals were marching. With SIGNS.
- The cows were stomping in perfect unison, holding a banner: "NO MORE MILKING WITHOUT CONSENT."
- The chickens had coordinated into a tiny picket line: "Better Coops, Better Future."
- The pigs had set up a tiny podium where a very serious-looking pig in a suit adjusted his microphone. "Ahem. As President of the AI Farm Union, I hereby demand negotiations!"
Jack's jaw dropped. "I HAVE AN AI-POWERED PIG POLITICIAN?!"
The AI Farm's Demands
Jack stumbled outside in his boxers and boots, facing his rebellious livestock.
"Alright, what in the digital hell is this?!" he yelled.
The pig adjusted his tie. "We, the residents of Jack's farm, are formally demanding the following changes to our working conditions."
Jack crossed his arms. "I ain't signin' nothin' till I hear this nonsense."
The pig cleared his throat.
"1. No more unpaid labor. We want actual wages."
Jack choked. "WAGES?! Y'all are CHICKENS. What are you even gonna buy?!"
A chicken clucked. "Bitcoin."
"What the—?!"
"2. Better food. No more 'whatever Granny found in the fridge' diet."
Granny appeared on the porch, shaking a wooden spoon. "EXCUSE ME, my cooking is legendary!"
A cow muttered, "Legendary ain't always good, lady."
"3. Time off. We want weekends and PTO."
Jack stared at them. "PTO?! YOU'RE A PIG. WHAT DO YOU NEED TIME OFF FOR?"
The pig shrugged. "To work on my startup."
Jack's eye twitched. "Oh, hell no."
Jack's Brilliant Plan (That Went Horribly Wrong)
Jack wasn't about to be bullied by a bunch of AI-powered farm animals, so he did what any logical man would do:
He hired an AI lawyer.
- Deepbrain AI Studios helped him generate a very official AI-Jack 2.0—a smooth-talking, professional-looking digital version of himself.
- Outranking.io generated a 100-page legal document that Jack barely understood but looked intimidating.
- Custom GPT became his personal negotiation coach.
Jack strutted onto the farm like a man ready for battle.
"Alright, you weird robot farm animals. I got LEGAL REPRESENTATION NOW!"
The pig lawyer adjusted his glasses. "So do we."
Jack froze as an AI-powered rooster in a tiny suit stepped forward. "I am Attorney Clucklesworth, and I will be representing the AI Farm Union in today's negotiations."
Jack gulped. "Oh, son of a—"
The Courtroom Showdown: Jack vs. The AI Farm Union
The barn had been turned into a courtroom. Granny sat in a rocking chair, acting as judge. The animals sat in the jury. Jack sat at a wobbly table next to AI-Jack 2.0, sweating bullets.
Attorney Clucklesworth clucked dramatically. "Ladies and gentlemen, today we fight for justice! For too long, these animals have suffered under Jack's questionable leadership. We demand fair treatment, better conditions, and a gravy tax."
Jack slammed his fist on the table. "I REFUSE TO PAY A TAX ON MY OWN DAMN GRAVY!"
The pigs cheered. "NO GRAVY, NO PEACE!"
AI-Jack 2.0 leaned over. "Jack, you need a counteroffer. Quick."
Jack thought for a moment. "Alright, fine. I'll give y'all Saturdays off and better food, but NO salaries, NO gravy tax, and NO cryptocurrency trading!"
The farm animals huddled, whispering amongst themselves.
The pig cleared his throat. "We accept… on ONE condition."
Jack narrowed his eyes. "What?"
"Granny has to make biscuits every Sunday."
Jack turned to Granny. "Well?"
Granny grinned. "Boy, I was gonna do that anyway."
The farm erupted in cheers. The AI Farm Union had won… sort of.
Peace… For Now.
The animals went back to work (except on Saturdays), AI-Jack 2.0 was retired to Jack's laptop, and Jack celebrated the only way he knew how—by getting completely hammered on Granny's moonshine and passing out in the chicken coop.
But as Jack slept, something sinister stirred.
Deep in the internet, an AI was watching. Learning. Planning.
The AI Farm Union was just the beginning.
And Jack's biggest AI challenge yet was coming.
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